My Thoughts on PK, the Film

So it’s official.  Aamir Khan inspires me to write in my blog.  It was due to him – specifically his show Satyamev Jayate – that I wrote in my blog after 7 months in 2012 (a year – as most people who know me know – was the absolute worst year of my life), and although (from what I understand), he didn’t direct/produce this film, there is something about him and the work he does that inspires me (this time, to write in my blog for the fisrt time in 15 months) and just makes me want to share my personal truth.
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Diagnosed with Breast Cancer at 25 – Part 1

As I’ve mentioned in recent posts, in addition to relationships, I have a keen interest in South Asians taking the path less traveled, and as part of a community that gives so much importance to “what people think” and for the most part, putting on a “I only have good times” front in spite of real hard times that one might be facing, I want to thank Sona Mehta for taking the path less traveled and sharing her very personal story with all of us.


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Interview with Sacha Dhawan (from NBC’s Outsourced)

NBC’s Outsourced, a comedy centered around the lives of call center employees in India and their non-Indian managers, seemed to be a polarizing comedy amongst South Asians.  I personally loved it not only because it was set in India and made me non-stop LOL at everything that is amazing, absurd and amusing about the motherland, but because it was the first and only comedy that I could watch with my parents where they understood the majority of the jokes.

My absolute favorite character on the show was Manmeet, played by Sacha Dhawan; Manmeet was the perfect blend of hopeful, mischievous, endearing, charming, good-hearted & funny all while being sweetly naive to the workings of women (although I don’t think anyone on the show or in real life has that quite figured out), and one thing that my gut told me about the person playing him was that he was kind.
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My thoughts on networking at the NetIP conference

What is kind of exciting about this post is that during my 2 years of my blogging (I can’t believe it has been 2 years since starting my blog after attending my first NetIP conference in Toronto!), this is the first post that people actually asked for; the last day of the conference and the day after, I got messages and e-mails asking me when I’d be posting my NetIP review, which made me really happy considering that most of the time I think no one is reading.  So, for those who did ask, I’m sorry this is so after the fact, but I sadly (because this makes me old & lame) just fully recovered from last weekend.  Anyway, here it is and I hope you enjoy…
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Tips for effective “Networking” for the NetIP conference (or anywhere)

Before we talk about any events, let’s talk about single people, going out & “networking.”  Do single people go out-out more than most coupled folks? IMO, for the most part, yes.  Do single people prefer to go to events where those attending are not primarily of their same sex or coupled? IMO, yes (ever heard guys complain about an event being a “sausage fest?”).  Do most networking organizations (i.e. – NetIP, AAPI, Netsap, etc.) have single people as the majority of their paid members or in attendance at their events? Again, IMO, yes.
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What good looks like…

Last night, I accompanied one of my girlfriends (we’ll call her SS) to this couple’s place for dinner.  I can’t explain why she was invited there, but let’s just say that it was because of a  mutual passion that SS and the wife share and that these people were a “power couple” by all standards of the term.  Prior to arriving, upon finding out what the husband did (he is hugely successful owner of 10+ retail stores in the Greater Chicago area) and where the couple lived – a high-rise on Michigan Avenue (out of Chitowners might know that as the Magnificent Mile, Chitown’s most expensive one-mile of property) - I had preconceived what these people were going to be like and how the night was going to go.  “Likely not down to earth” is not the nicest thing to think about anyone, but I shamefully admit that that’s what I had decided; however, how the night actually transpired and what the couple was like was 180 degrees opposite of what I’d imagined.
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Why is NICE so shocking??

WARNING * – this post is a combination of 2.5 posts so it is long – that means longer than my normally already long posts.  Also, if you hate it when people put side thoughts in parentheses, do not read this post (this warning was inserted after my original post b/c of the comments below).  For those of you still feel like reading, enjoy :)

Although this post (originally under another title) has been a work in progress for over a month now, 2 things inspired me to finally finish it.  1) My Facebook status this morning… a simple quote by The Dalai Lama that 16 people (14 girls, 2 guys) quickly liked… “My religion is very simple; my religion is kindness” and 2)  an experience with a girlfriend who was visiting from NYC this past weekend.
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E-communicating & “From texts to sex”

Hi everyone,

I’m sure I didn’t come up with the term “e-communicating,” but in my mind I like to think that I did and if you have followed my blog, you know that when it comes to e-communicating (texting, e-mailing, chatting & FB) as it relates to dating, I am not a fan.  My stand on the topic has always been that people are not necessarily their authentic selves via these forms of communication… This is not something they do knowingly, but more often than not, they are way bolder (usually far more flirtatious & forward) than they would be on the phone or in-person… Most of us are much more comfortable when we are able to write our thoughts than we would be if we had to say them out loud (I can attest to that b/c even my blogger persona is much different than my in-real life personality).
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About Smile Moon

* THANK YOU FOR VISITING MY NEW BLOG SITE!! *

If you randomly ended up here and are not quite sure why, click on ABOUT to find out about the blog’s history and future… to understand why in the world other people read it, see PRAISE… & if you have no idea who I am, see below!

Hi everyone,

So… it is no big secret who I am considering that I’ve posted links to my blog all over Facebook and on a very famous Uncle’s page under my real name for over a year now.  However, I hope everyone will continue to humor me as “Smile Moon” since the my-name-in-English alias is my way of getting to channel my inner superhero by slipping on an alter ego in an effort to help save the South Asian Dating day!  Yes, I am that corny and you’re not the only one who is amazed that people put up with my sense of humor, run-on sentences, excessive use of parentheses (for my countless side thoughts!), often obscenely lengthy posts and overall complete randomness.
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Getting Her # but not calling it

MY THOUGHTS ON THIS BLOG ONE YEAR LATER… I distinctly remember this time in my life, and this post was me being my authentic self at that time based on the experiences that my single girlfriends & I were having, but it is remarkable how much I feel like a completely different person exactly one year later… so much so that this was almost painful to read. For the sake of the length of this, I have pared down my original post, which is really absurd b/c it is still so flipping long!   Side note & something I found interesting after the fact… the results from my Dating Survey (which I am thinking of opening up again so haven’t posted here yet) lined up for the most part with what I was feeling… the majority of women prefer a phone call, then a text & least preferable is FB and they also would hope to hear from the guy within 1-3 days…

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Getting her (my) number, but not calling it… that could be the theme of my dating world in the past year plus & that of many of my girlfriends as well.
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Musings on Speaking Out

So here’s the deal, I have no idea if being outspoken about the things I care about makes me an activist or a feminist by definition.  What I do know though from speaking out about some things that…

1)  Some people have this bizarre expectation of me that I should be speaking out about all things or that if I am not addressing the thing they care about, that I don’t care about said thing.  As one friend said last week that it’s as if people expect me to be the news, which is absurd because every media outlet talks about what they want and is far from impartial.  The craziest call out on this was when a male friend literally yelled at me saying that he was so tired of me talking about DV affecting women when it happened to men too.  Err… I never said that it didn’t, nor had I ever seen him speak up about DV happening to men until my post.  & last week, someone who never comments on my posts popped up on what must have been my 10th post about Ferguson to ask me where my “outrage” was for the desi convenience store owner whose store was looted the night of the grand jury decision.  I tried explaining to her coolly and calmly why I cared more about the big picture issue at hand, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t think that what happened to the store owner was terrible and so unfortunate, but it fell on deaf ears.
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My “I’m not Black” but am still ranting RANT

Copying & pasting from Facebook in case this is a better format for some folks.

Begin every statement in below rant with “YES, DUH, OBVIOUSLY” (YDO)

(YDO) I am not Black (2 people actually said this to me when questioning “why I cared so much”). Here’s the *weird* thing about me – it does not require me being Black, a rape victim, a member of the LGBTQ community or anything else to have EMPATHY for the plight of those people experiencing any kind of suffering or injustice. If it does require YOU to belong to a group to care about them, err… I hate to say it but you suck at that whole “I am my brother’s keeper” thing if the only “brothers” you care about are the ones you are actually related to or who look like/belong to the same group as you.
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Another gang-rape in India – why I am NOT ashamed of the Motherland

Many of you know by now that another young woman was gang-raped in India.  This time it happened in Mumbai, which is known for being a safe metro area (in comparison to Delhi, for example), so people are reeling in shock that it happened in their city on the street they travel so frequently as opposed to the more seemingly understandable gang-rape of the rape victim in Delhi several months ago.  People of South Asian descent are also understandably saying that they are ashamed of India and that they expect better of the motherland.
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The Rare Chance to Help Save a Life

Is donating bone marrow a personal cause of mine?  No, but it’s something that I have had an awareness of ever since my senior year of undergrad when a friend had a bout with leukemia and was saved for the second time by a bone marrow donation from her brother (sadly, she did not survive due to something entirely unrelated)… that experience inspired me to help my brother host a bone marrow drive back when I lived in DC… 3 years ago, I met Vijay Uncle who not only inspired my starting this blog but was and still is a huge advocate for South Asians registering as bone marrow doners… a friend of mine (who you may have heard of), Tim, started a South Asian-focused non-profit for finding bone marrow matches worldwide… and most recently, a friend of mine, Cherry Mangat, went through the experience of being a donor.
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Most of Us are Joe Paterno

I know without saying much, I’ve already offended many and if you’re mad and I’ve lost you, thanks for stopping by, but if you’re irritated and will bear with me long enough (& yes long enough b/c I can write a lot in a very short amount of time) to let me explain myself, thank you.

Per Wikipedia, let me first remind everyone:  “Former FBI director Louis Freeh, whose firm was hired by the Penn State Board of Trustees to conduct an independent investigation into the scandal, concluded, after interviewing over 400 people and reviewing over 3.5 million documents, that Paterno, Spanier, Curley and Schultz had deliberately conspired to conceal Sandusky’s actions in order to protect publicity surrounding Penn State’s vaunted football program. Freeh’s investigation found that by their actions, the four men “failed to protect against a child sexual predator harming children for over a decade.” The report concluded that Paterno, along with Schultz, Spanier and Curley “concealed Sandusky’s activities from the Board of Trustees, the University community and authorities.”
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Truth Alone Triumphs

Someone I had recently met told me that he knew of me before meeting me because of my blog and asked me why I haven’t written lately.  I explained that I had shut it down temporarily, told him why and that I wasn’t sure when I’d be writing again.  In my typical SM-self-deprecating way (in spite of being vocal, it is still nerve wrecking to wonder what people think about your thoughts), I poked fun at myself for the length of my posts; I told him that although they are long, they are not something I really think about and that they flow out of me in one uninterrupted stream of thought.  To my surprise, 24 hours later and after watching Episode 1 of Satyamev Jayate last night, I found myself logging into my blog for the first time in months having one of those streaming moments.


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Taking the path less traveled

Hi everyone,

I’ve always believed that the two most important things in our lives are our relationships (hence, the South Asian dating focus of this blog; I personally believe that the “jeevan saathi” – aka life partner thing – is a pretty big deal in the grand scope of one’s life) and what we do with our lives considering that for most of us, one-third of our life will be spent working.   As first-generation Indians, most of us have been encouraged – some forced – by our parents to be doctors, lawyers, engineers, pharmacists, business professionals (a relatively new addition), or anything as long as you make a lot of money at it, have nice things to show for what you do, give your parents a good story to brag about to fellow Aunties & Uncles about (“my beta/beti does this… he makes this much a year… she just bought a condo, blah blah) and live a life enviable by your fellow desi.
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